It’s easy to find ourselves frustrated when we have little ones, especially at 3am when they want to chat, or when they say they need to poop and you get them all bundled up and trudge to the bathroom (we’re camping) and they don’t poop.

The magic of children is that as quick as they can frustrate you, they can turn it around and make your heart burst at the seams with love.

After the bathroom fiasco we got back to the yurt and snuggled in. Lucy crawled into bed with Odette and I, which is a rarity as she prefers daddy snuggles these days. She snuggled into one arm and fell asleep, and Odette snuggled into the other arm. With both of my girls on either side of me and just the glow of the fireplace, I felt any frustration melt away and my heart just bursting with love. How lucky I am to have these two beautiful babies.

Grateful, thankful, blessed

When I gave birth to Lucy in 2016 our town was seriously lacking in mom/baby and mon/toddler groups or events. There was the early years baby group, but it was on Wednesdays from 1-3pm, and since Lucy was an awful sleeper I never wanted to miss nap time. That was MY time to catch up on sleep (self care people!). There was also a walking group that started that fall, which helped me meet moms, but that was pretty much the extent of things. Overall I felt sad and frustrated, especially during the long Huron County winters. I needed to get out, I needed to connect. I often found myself driving into London, but the hour+ drive was exhausting.

Fast forward 2 year and things are changing. There is still the baby group and walking group, but there is much more happening. I mentioned in my previous post there is mom and baby yoga. Most notably, a lovely group of ladies who run a business called Huron Birth have really catered to the fact that moms need more here.

Huron Birth was started as a doula service by one local woman. She has since expanded her business to include more doulas as well as host workshops, mom and baby groups and health/fitness oriented groups as well. I’ve attended toddler groups, a fun event hosted for pregnant women that included belly casting, yoga, and empowerment activities, and some general “come hang out and chat” type of gatherings. In the new year I fully intend to join their baby group and toddler group.

When I found these groups, I started to finally feel a sense of belonging. I found my people. Thier parenting styles often align with mine, but they are also women who aren’t judgemental, and they support other women. They’ve also inspired me. I am going to do training to offer peer support in our local MILKS (mothers initiating lactation knowledge) groups in February. I would like to find more ways to get involved as well, hopefully the new year will present some new opportunities.

It’s nice to see this rural area changing for the better and being a more welcoming place for young families. It makes me really feel like a part of the community and I hope to see this growth continue.

I’m a bit behind posting this, but I wanted to talk about the importance of getting out and being active, which ties a bit into my last post about the benefit of a ‘tribe’ (I want a better term for that… Suggestions?).

Right now on Tuesdays Lucy goes to daycare. Yoga den has started a 6 week mom and baby yoga class. It’s so refreshing to stretch and move in a place where everyone understands that baby might cry and fuss. This week we were also blessed with sunshine so I took the opportunity to get outdoors. Odette and I walked to yoga, did a bit of shopping after and I grabbed a coffee before heading back home. After getting some mom time and fresh air, I felt lighter and happier.6

This week we also decided to join the ymca again. This allows us to take Lucy to the childcare area while Dave and I go for a walk (Odette typically sleeps in the carrier). Not only is being active good for both of us, but it also allows for some time together to talk and connect without any toddler interruptions. Eventually when Odette is a bit older, she will also go to the childcare, allowing us to actually get in shape again!

All of these things we did this week are so important. Just like having a wonderful group of women to talk to can really improve your mood, getting out and being active has a serious positive impact on mental health. Don’t under estimate the value of getting out of the house! It can be a daunting task with toddlers and babies, but it is worth the effort.

I know where you think I’m going with this… Fun, right? Well, yes, but not always in the Cindy Lauper out all night partying way. Usually what we really want is just a small get together with other moms. A night where we can talk, vent about life as a mom and bounce stories and ideas off of each other. A place where we can say ‘my kid is an asshole’ and we aren’t met with judgment but rather a sympathy, because we GET IT. Everyone in that room has also felt like their kid is an asshole.

On Friday I hosted a girl’s night. The plan was actually to have a reading with a psychic medium, but she cancelled last minute. So, we all spent time together talking about life and motherhood. At the end of the night, even though the evening didn’t go as planned, I felt fantastic.

I used to be a little skeptical of the concept of the need to find your ‘tribe’, because I felt many women use it as a way to make a clique. What I’ve learned is that doesn’t have to be true. The need to have other women to talk to in this life stage is real, but don’t feel like you have to only have a small group of people and block the rest out.

It took me a long time to feel like I found like minded people, and it took a lot of effort and putting myself out there. Being an ‘outsider’ in a small town it was hard, but it was worth it. I have so many wonderful women around me now. They have varied backgrounds and experiences, but they are inclusive and non judgemental. They are accepting and welcoming. Most of all, they are all here to help each other stay sane in this crazy season of life called parenting.

Well, here I am, starting a blog. A bit behind the times? Yep, but that suits my life. Really, I don’t even have Instagram yet.

I’m not sure at this point exactly where I intend to go with this blog, but I often find myself needing an outlet for my thoughts. I don’t claim to be a particularly interesting person or profound thinker, but maybe I’ll surprise myself (and anyone reading this). At the bare minimum I expect this to be a bit cathartic.

I suspect that most people who take the time to read this will already know me, but I’ll give a brief introduction. I’m a stay at home mom of two daughters. Lucy is almost 2.5 and Odette is 6 weeks old. I grew up in rural Ontario and my husband and I moved to our current town almost 4 years ago.

So yeah, welcome to my blog! Let’s see where this goes!

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton